Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Silence.
Sometimes I've just get to get use to what is happening, since i cant control or i dont have the choice to choose how could it happen.
Getting use to a situation or a change is quite easy. Just have to stay real silent, hide your tears.
The moment you keep silent, you are keeping your words, you are keeping all the thoughts in you. The person you are facing maybe is angry, upset for you dont understand what he / she is saying or trying to make you understand.
But, when you keep quiet, you tend to listen to them. When you listen to them, you calm them down and they will be much more happier.
Happiness is alwaiz built on other one's sadness right?
Tried to look for someone to talk to, but it is hard. scrolling up and down the list but there is no one to talk to. As i cuddle my pillow tight, i start to wonder : how did i walk through these years like this?
Its alwaiz disappointed to know when someone you want to talk to is asleep or the call just flies to the voice mail.
But what can you do about it?
All you can do is, keep it to yourself. Cause you wont want another person upset coz of your silly thoughts right?
Monday, July 13, 2009
PEOPLE.
But, thats not all. You get so see so many different kinds of people.
Busy people with PDA's on their hands, checking their iphone on and off the minute..
Beautiful gals walking by with their fancy and trendy short mini skirts and high lengthed boots...
Shopaholics with all of their branded shopping bags..
Bitchy gals walking in a group gossiping about other ppl's bf / gf ..
Street hangers hanging around (as usual) with a smoke between fingers trying to act cool..
Smart looking office white collar with nice black laptop bags rushing on and off the escalator..
High school students in their striking white and blue uniforms wandering around..
You get to fish so many people, fashion, weird actions just by sitting near the windows in Starbucks.
Isnt that worth RM 15.29?
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
对不起
男孩和女孩从小就认识,男孩经常约女孩一起去村外的池塘边捉小虾,每次男孩总是满载而归,女孩却是两手空空,女孩总是失落的含着眼泪,独自一个人回到家,然后闷闷不乐。晚饭前,男孩敲响女孩家的门,女孩一见是男孩,扭头就走,男孩追上前,对女孩说:“对不起,我把你的虾都捉走了,给,我把它们养在小鱼缸里,送给你。”女孩眉头一放,慧心的笑了,就这样反复着他们纯纯的童年,转眼,他们各自成长着。
——纯纯的“对不起” 。
男孩总是喜欢戏弄女孩,经常会把女孩逗到哭,然后又去哄女孩到她笑为止,直到长大后,也是如此。男孩经常偷偷的把女孩的自行车轮胎的气放到没有,然后躲在远处,看女孩着急的走投无路,等着女孩拨通他的手机,然后破口大骂他的小贼行为。可男孩,依旧那么喜欢这样的女孩。他窃窃的从远处走来,灰溜溜的为女孩推着那辆没了气的自行车,任由女孩在一旁发牢骚,男孩却暗自窃喜,然后委屈的对女孩说:“对不起,我知道错了。”随即,女孩便会柔弱下来,告诉男孩下次不允许那样,男孩点头,于是,那时的他们每天都充满着笑容。
—— “对不起”的快乐 。
大学毕业后,男孩和女孩各自有了工作,男孩的工作总是很忙,有时一个月都休息不到一次,而女孩总是抱怨男孩冷落了她,终于,他们有了第一次的吵架。女孩委屈的哭起来,可男孩却很理直气壮的告诉女孩:“这是为了我的工作。”这场冷战持续了很久。终于,女孩还是忍不住,主动和男孩和好了。后来很多次男孩和女孩都因为这样的小事而吵得不可开交,可每次,都是女孩先妥协。 那年,女孩生日,男孩答应女孩要给他过一个浪漫的生日,女孩欣喜不已,她在家精心打扮,等着男孩回来陪她渡过这个美妙的生日,这一等就是凌晨,女孩在睡梦中醒来,脸上挂着泪痕,男孩见到女孩,心疼的为女孩擦去脸庞的泪痕:“对不起,嫁给我好吗?”于是男孩拿出一枚戒指。
—— “对不起”也是一种承诺。
婚后,男孩的事业大有成就,经常有许多应酬,而女孩已经成为一个专职太太了,每天在家为男孩准备热菜热饭,把家里收拾的干干净净,她经常会去菜场买回一些小河虾放在鱼缸里养着,男孩总问他为什么,女孩却总是慧心的一笑。 慢慢的,男孩每次回家,身上总是充满了不同的香水味道,而每次没等女孩问,男孩总是忙着解释说应酬太多。女孩黯然,那时起,女孩不太爱说话了,也不像以前那么开朗了,她总是喜欢成天的呆在家里,抱着枕头看韩剧,然后随着剧情哭泣,夜深时,就会疯狂的大哭。以后的日子里,男孩回来时,身上的香水味只有一种味道了,女孩从来不问,可是男孩依旧说:“对不起,今天又去应酬了。”
—— “对不起”,谎言的开始。
渐渐的,男孩开始不回家,或总是在外出差,男孩的事业越来越好,身边都是奉承的人,他每天都在别人的恭维下自豪的笑着,而女孩,几乎不出门了,她总会去超市买上很多方便面,和一些必要的日用品,然后把自己关在家里,这一呆就是很久。从前,女孩会经常和男孩一起聊聊天,而现在,她孤身一人,身边没有一个可以说话的人,每次打电话问男孩什么时候回家,男孩总是仓促的回答到:“对不起,我太忙了。”女孩,失落的扣上电话,那以后她再也没有问男孩什么时候会回家。
—— “对不起”,只是个敷衍的方式。
女孩学着电视上的样子,开始打扮自己,她觉得男孩不回家,也许是看腻了她,她决定不再颓废,自己的幸福应该靠自己争取,而不是无谓的后退. 那天,女孩心血来潮,按照地址去了男孩工作的地方,那是女孩第一次去,也是唯一的一次。女孩涩涩的按下电梯,来到这个男孩经常说忙的地方,她细细的观察这个公司的每个角落,这里的一切,她都觉得很好看。终于,绕过长长的办公走廊,她来到男孩的办公室,轻轻的推开门……女孩愣住了,眼前看到的不是自己的丈夫,也不是那个经常弄坏她自行车的那个贼小子,更不是那个把虾放在小鱼缸里的男孩,而是一个正在和别的女人做爱的男人。那个女人坐在桌子上,******的发出微弱的呻吟声,那个男人,仿佛山林里饿极了的野兽…… 许久,男孩才发现了女孩,男孩惊慌失措,忙把衣裤捡起来穿好。可女孩,转身离开了。男孩飞奔出去,追着女孩,那晚,大雨袭击了整个城市。女孩不顾男孩的叫喊,径直往前跑,往回家的方向跑,男孩在女孩后面大喊:“对不起,我还是爱你的,对不起,我真的只爱你。”可女孩,始终没有听见。
—— 这样的“对不起”太伤人。
男孩一直都没有找到女孩,女孩失踪很久了。男孩的世界已经一片黑暗,无心工作,无心花天酒地,他想不到女孩可以去哪里,因为女孩没有朋友,她唯一的朋友就是男孩,男孩终日守着电话机,手机24小时不关机,怕错过了女孩的电话。这一等就是半年多. 快递为男孩送来一个盒子。 男孩打开一看,里面是许多河虾的标本,有的在树叶边休息,有的在水草里躲着,各式各样的河虾标本,旁边放着一封信。 “ 我始终没有勇气再见到你,可能是我太懦弱,也或许是我根本不想见到你,我想这些『警告:注意文明用语!』应该过的没什么两样吧,我很好,我学会了离开你怎么让自己存活,我懂得了怎样赚钱养活自己,而不用每天等着你回家,为你烧一桌热腾腾的饭菜,直到凉了也不见你的人,我的手机已经不用了,因为我已经不会再为你24小时的不关机,让自己饱受辐射的折磨。我懂得怎样去爱惜自己,珍惜自己的本来应该美好的生活。我想,我是可以忘记怎么去爱你的,因为你把我的爱弄得遍地麟伤。离婚协议书,就压在鱼缸的底下,你签完字,按照地址给我寄过来就行了。 对不起,我想我是真的累了。” 男孩按照地址找去,他满心希望能够见到女孩,然后让女孩原谅,并且告诉女孩自己不能没有她,可是打开门的却是女孩的父亲,而女孩就站在她父亲的身后——是女孩的遗像。 女孩的父亲告诉男孩,女孩在写完这封信后,跳楼自杀了,血肉一片模糊。
—— 原来“对不起”也可以是种结束。
那一年,男孩疯了。
Friday, July 3, 2009
Another week has gone by
I never thought that i would become someone like today; 10 years back down the road, i wont even come to recognize who am i now.
Just attended a fashion workshop organized by Jaspel, Runway and Snips. I was late for the fashion show and just manage to sit in for a presentation about fashion history. The presenter was really really GAY.... i mean feminine (trying to be polite). But i need to admit he is abit Pro, those things he said did make some sense.
He refresh my mind on how to dress up, bring up yourself and dress like a pro *quote from the Pro presenter* LOL.. need to change my wardrobe again?!
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
A Song
I remember everything with you. The good, the bad, the happy and the sad. I am sorry i let you down again. Thanks for tolerating me all these while..I know you tried very hard.
I found the song over the net. It still sing to me sleep every night, cuddling Meeko's cousin sis in my arms..afraid that she will disappear too......
I still miss the breakfast you made.
I still miss the dinner you prepare for me..
I still miss the jokes you told over our dinner table..
I still miss the way you hate the song when its play over the radio..
I still miss all the expressions you have, just to make me smile..
I still miss the way we fight for Footy..
I still miss...............................
There are so many things....
so many things i want to tell you... so many things....
习惯是琥珀 泪一滴滴 被反锁
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Weird Dream
Its dreaming about being all alone.
Tried so hard to reach out my hand but there is no one to catch..
Someone picked up my hand and wipe my tears but, in the end i was thrown back to the ground.
Someone whispered to me that i will be ok, someone is there to alwaiz support me, but just when i was about to smile, someone is not there..
I cant see their faces, it was so dark and obviously they dont even have a face. Its just a human figure with blank fronts.
I found myself crying in my dreams..
I wont let myself cry when i wake up. I know i have someone to turn to. I know what i should do. I know myself.
No. I wont screw everything up like i just did in the dream.
Thursday, May 28, 2009
Another week has gone by
I suddenly had the urge to install The Sims and SDO again. Not sure what happen to me but just felt that i have itchy fingers.
There are too many to-do-thingy pending in my to-do-list. Really have no idea where to start em. It is as messay as my post today... aimless, no main point, just loose points floating in midair.
*Start spacing out .... then hallucinating... **seriously need some sleep**
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
In search for nice songs

Monday, May 25, 2009
五月的天空
好喜欢有他在身边的感觉, 总是扮可爱的样子逗我开心。
总爱对我撒娇,那只属于我的表情。
一起逛街,一起看电影,一起在家里看电视,一起加油。。
好多一起的回忆。
贪心的我 可以继续跟你索取更多的回忆么?
Sunday, May 3, 2009
男孩子都不知道
实很多男孩子都不知道,女孩子从来不会真正去生他们的气,因为她是真的喜欢他在乎他。
其实很多男孩子都不知道,女孩子只会对自己喜欢的男生唠唠叨叨,也只会对自己喜欢的人耍性子。
你要知道,假若她不喜欢你,她根本不会来在乎你关心你,怕你做错事情。
你要知道,假若她不喜欢你,她根本不会对你发火不会冲你撒娇让你哄她,在别人面前她都是淑女。
你要知道,假若她不喜欢你,你根本就没有本事让她哭泣,让她即使生气也不会超过2天。
而这一切都只是因为她喜欢你,而这一切都因为你还不够在意她不够懂她。
于是,你们时常争吵,你认为她脾气不好,她认为你不够迁就她。
于是,你们总是冷战,你以为她不喜欢你,她以为你不在乎她。
于是,你们总是莫名其妙的彼此错过,也许擦身而过,本身就是一种悲伤着的无奈与幸福。
要知道,凄美依然是美的一种,并且美的绚丽悲凉而沧桑,那是更加的美。
因为她喜欢你,所以她偶尔冲你发火,时常对你撒娇。因为她喜欢你,所以她才会生你的气;而又因为喜欢你,她才不会去生气很久。
你可知道,每个女孩子的心都是水晶做的,晶莹剔透,但是很容易就碰伤摔碎。
你可知道,每个女孩子都是不设防的,你那么轻易就闯进她的心,走的时候却只留下伤害。
她从来都不知道,这个世界上根本没有可以让她哭的人,因为真正值得她哭的那个根本舍不得让她哭。
她会很矜持,她会很骄傲,她会很冷淡,她总是嘴里说着你走开,心里却一直叫你留下。
你了解女孩吗?
请你张开你的耳朵,也请你打开你的心,去听她心里真正的呼唤,而不是她嘴里的口是心非。
她会看着你转身,然后她跟着你转身,当侧身而过的时候,你看不见她的泪,滂沱在脸上心里。如果你喜欢她,请你多陪她;如果你喜欢她,请你多宠她;如果你喜欢她,请你多让她。
如果你喜欢她,请你去听听她内心的声音,那是呐喊——请拥抱她。
在爱情里,总是彼此伤害,彷佛这样才能证明自己爱得激烈爱到轰轰烈烈。
可是,爱情里没有孰对孰错;爱情里更加没有你比我多我比你少。
你爱她,她爱你,如此就已经足够。
不要试图让彼此的伤害,让彼此更加脆弱悲伤。
你们彼此相爱,你们需要的是温暖是幸福是甜蜜是快乐,不是伤害。
不要用沉默宣战,不要互不相让,更不要什么话都不讲就冷漠离去。
要知道,你离去的时候,你的眼睛起了雾,她的眼角泛着泪光。
越是安静战火就越深,这是冷战也是彼此的伤害——无论是怎么的复合,那些伤口曾经存在,抹不去。
请跟她一个拥抱,用你的拥抱去化解她心里的悲伤与眼角的泪水。
她喜欢你,她绝对不会拒绝你的拥抱,她只会害怕你的冷漠转身无声安静.请记住,相爱的人不要轻易宣战,因为冷战带来的伤害,超出你的预计。
也请记住,只要你喜欢她,没有什么是你接受不了的,只要你喜欢她,就喜欢她的一切一切。
那么她所有的小性子所有的坏脾气所有的臭毛病,在你眼里都是撒娇。
也请记住,她喜欢你,她需要的不是你真的转身,她嘴里说着的也不是她的真心话。
她只是想你宠她,想你抱她,哪怕,没有道谦。
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
What hurt the most?
lyricsSongwriters: Steele, Jeffrey; Robson, Steve;
I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house
That don't bother me
I can take a few tears now and then and just let ?em out
I'm not afraid to cry every once in a while even though
Goin' on with you gone still upsets me
There are days every now and again
I pretend I'm okay
But that's not what gets me
What hurts the most
Was being so close
And havin' so much to say
And watchin' you walk away
And never knowin'
What could've been
And not seein' that lovin' you
Is what I was tryin' to do
It's hard to deal with the pain of losin' you everywhere I go
But I'm doin' it
It's hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I'm alone
Still harder gettin' up, gettin' dressed, livin' with this regret
But I know if I could do it over
I would trade, give away all the words that I saved in my heart
That I left unspoken
What hurts the most
Is being so close
And havin' so much to say
(Much to say)
And watchin' you walk away
And never knowin'
What could've been
And not seein' that lovin' you
Is what I was tryin' to do, oh
Oh yeah
What hurts the most
Was being so close
And havin' so much to say
(To say)
And watchin' you walk away
And never knowin'
What could've been
And not seein' that lovin' you
Is what I was tryin' to do
Not seein' that lovin' you
That's what I was trying to do, ooo
Friday, April 10, 2009
Tiramisu
Listening to songs and got my mind wondering around.
Suddenly felt like eating Tiramisu, its been a long time I last had my Tiramisu. *Droolling*
After that Tiramisu kept poping out , there comes the list of the things I like to eat.. *GOSH*
First, its a tub of Häagen-Dazs Rum Raisin..
Then, Mini poppers..
Then, pasta...
Then, San Fransico's extreame mocha...
Then, ......
Then.......
Not that much right?
Saturday, March 21, 2009
Life's too short
Break The Rules,
Forgive Quickly,
Kiss Slowly,
Love Truly,
Laugh Uncontrollably,
And Never Regret AnythingThat Made You Smile.
Life May Not Be The PartyWe Hoped For
But
While We're Here, We Should Dance...
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
喜歡与愛
當你喜歡一個人時,你想和他在一起,因為他會帶給你快樂;
離開後,你會想念,想著想著就會笑,然後繼續你平靜的生活,並期待著與他再一次重逢。
當你愛一個人時,你想和他在一起,那是一種牽腸掛肚的捨不得,怕他受委屈,怕他不能好好照顧自己;離開後,你也會想念,想著想著歎一口氣,'不知他現在過的怎樣?'然後你繼續你平靜的生活,希望他早日回到你身邊。
你喜歡的人在你眼中是天使,無所不能,他總會滿足你的任性的要求。
你愛的人在你眼中是孩子,傻傻的,你不期望他做出什麼'好事'來,只一味縱容他那些讓人哭笑不得的舉動。
你會希望你喜歡的人陪著你,然而你心中想的可能是你愛的人;
你會希望陪在你愛的人身邊,看他在你面前睡得如此安逸甜美毫不設防的樣子,你會微笑,會覺得好幸福。
你喜歡的人傷害了你,你會生氣,並且一定要讓他哄著騙著逗你笑你才原諒他;
你愛的人傷害了你,你只會獨自傷心,因為你怕對他大吼大叫會嚇著他,你憂傷地微笑著,看著他的眼睛,一旦發現他的眼裡流露出歉意和悔恨,你會立即心疼地摟他在懷裡,那一刻,你也是幸福的。
你可以同時喜歡很多人,你會希望和很多人在一起,但也許很多年後你才發現,原來你愛的就只有那麼一個,就那麼一個,怎麼都不會變,你以為把他忘記了,其實只是忙的沒空想起而已,對於你喜歡的人,你關注的是他的優點;
對於你愛的人,你關注的是他的缺點,並且,那些缺點如果無關原則的話,它們在你眼裡是可愛的,獨一無二的。
喜歡和愛其實只有一紙之隔,任何愛都從喜歡開始,當有天你突然發現,你喜歡的那個人在你眼中不再完美,而他的瑕疵正如月中的桂影一般讓你更加依依不捨,你會覺得與他光彩照人的一面相比,你更願意看他在你面前無助的表情,不知道是不是應該祝賀你,總之,你的感情昇華了
——仰慕不是愛,甚至不是喜歡,當你對一個人只有仰慕之情時,你們在一起便失去了和諧。
有人說愛一個人很累,的確是,因為你想為他承擔,可是愛與喜歡相比最大的魅力就在於,當你和愛的人在一起時,你的感覺就像回家了!
Friday, February 27, 2009
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Its February.
Went back to Inti yesterday and bumped into christina. Its glad to see everyone is moving on as usual, just abit different - feelings are different.hmmmmm I am glad that he accompanied me throughout the day and although i am sick now, i'm smiling.. hehe *silly lappit*
Watched the HK drama series - jewels and found out that it really make ppl think stupidly. Sometimes i just wonder, when you bump into your ex lover, what kind of feelings runs through your thoughts? For me, its kinda hard to be friends like long before you guys coupled. Atleast, you will have to respect the partner who is now present and you wouldnt want him to get sour over this kinda stuff right? We cant change what has happen, but i can control what's ahead of me.
I just hope that the happiness would last - this time
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
冒失鬼
发现自己最近喜欢发呆,看看天空,胡思乱想一通 -- 一个下午就这样过去了。
总是把一些重要的东西遗漏或则忘记了, 好冒失哦~
眼泪出走了, 微笑也出走了。
我是否被遗忘了?
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
New start
Watched Twillight on those lousy privated DVD and i really regret not going to the cinemas for this movie... The story line is beautiful and the actors especially Edward Collen.... arghhhh he is just too charming (not sure whether i got his name spelled correctly and i understand its the character in the movie i fell for.. not the real person)
Other than watching movies and answering those default questions thrown by relatives and friends, i really have not much to do on CNY. Few days ago, i just helped mum to make the Cheese cake with the aid of few fellows and some butter orange cake... The cheese cake seems to be too sweet on the crush whereas the others are just fine..
Now the next up coming event is valentine and some public holidays which i dont even know why we had holiday on that day =.=
*ps: i found some language disorder in the post... please bear with me T_T
Sunday, January 18, 2009
小事情
也许只是去厨房为我倒杯水,或则说帮我去开灯,或则当当跑腿,帮我买点好吃的。
小事情 - 并不重要,可是能带给我的是贴心的感觉。当然这些事情我自己都能胜任,可是会偶尔想懒惰下,希望他肯为我服务。
他会口里喃喃自语说我懒惰 然后听话的为我去做点小事情 , 我会很感动。
我不需要他为我赴汤蹈火,也不用他给我什么山盟海誓,说什么答应会一辈子照顾我。
一个男人为所爱的女人死而后已的机会,说不定今生今世也不会出现;至于承诺,也会消逝。而在我懒惰的时候,肯为我到厨房倒水,帮我换换外套,这些机会,一辈子多的呢。
他不必爱我到永远,谁知道永远有多远呢?
当我说:可以帮我绑鞋带么?
而他愿意俯下身去为我做一件这么小的事情,那瞬间,已经是永远。
当然我自己也该适可而止,太多的会带来烦躁的情绪,有时候 我也该为他服务服务。
当两个人相爱,并不是爱上对方个体,而是爱上对方所带的地域。
这地域包含着 一个人的过去,开心的回忆, 家庭背景, 成长过程受过的创伤,过去的感情,受过的教育,爱过的人,爱恶和志趣。
爱一个人,同时意味着你愿意了解这片地域。
Saturday, January 17, 2009
我决定。
虽然这话挂在嘴边大概有3年 我还是还没去实行。。 每次都是大概到了一半就把书丢在一边。
这次不行~
*有时候在想 人是否口是心非 - 说不介意的事情 其实心底很介意呢?
Another another Sunday
Well, it doesnt really matters coz i really have no idea what am i posting in my previous draft.
All i remember was - I am bored, sleepy...
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
一堆的字
Monday, January 12, 2009
午后的红茶
装入一个小杯子里
倒入热水
茶叶就会飞舞起来
杯子里充满了神秘 可爱的舞蹈
可惜 舞蹈太短暂 不是每个人都能品赏
在茶桌上议论的 就围绕在红茶品质,味道上
为何没有人会留意 茶叶在茶杯中那短暂的舞台
为什么没有人会留意 生活上小小的细节?
为什么没有人会留意到身边每个人微妙的变化
Sunday, January 11, 2009
2008
发现
钢琴黑白健 所演奏的已经不再是同一个旋律
是否该停顿下来 好好的 用心的 细腻的 仔细的 聆听
那心灵演奏曲
那段不熟悉的音调 听起来有点刺耳
我
不断告诉自己 用心聆听 不是用耳朵。
因为我能了解 演奏的心 已经遍体鳞伤
Monday, January 5, 2009
恋文
在蓝天下想着什么
一个两个都闭着眼睛
扳着手指数每一个快乐的日子
我爱你各种各样的姿态
微风吹拂着我的脸盘时
我才认识到了爱情
在我远望你的地方
希望有你的身影
把瞬间的美丽珍藏在心里
不管流逝多少年
还是希望能像平时一样笑出来
同时也希望你我一起笑出来
用肉眼看不到的
偶尔会很不安也很孤独
但以这样的理由
每一天都变得很快乐
把你各种姿态展现给我
把美丽容颜下发誓爱情
就因为这样
如果是为了我
如果那只是你的谎言
对我来说那个已成为了现实
虽然你慢慢地发生变化
能继续想你
结果只能成为这样
以这种方式放弃的事情
虽不是很容易的事情
再怎么容易也无法让它如愿以尝
